06/07/2018

It’s hard running a legal practice …

I was in court the other day and the Judge says to my client: “Why did you steal the car?”
and my client says: “I had to get to work” so the Judge naturally asks: “Why didn’t you take the bus?”
and the client replies: “I don’t have a license to drive a bus”.

I get back to the office and realise I’ve lost my wallet.  So I announce to the staff: “I’ve lost my wallet with $500 in it, so if you find it, I’m offering a $100 reward”.  A voice in the background says: “I’m offering $200”

It was my teenage son.  I told him “Son, you were adopted”. He says “What?! I want to meet my biological parents!” and I said “We are your biological parents. Now pack up, the new ones’ll pick you up in 20 minutes.”